Just as anticipation is part of waiting and the Christian walk, disappointment is also a prevalent part. From living in a defective world filled with broken, depraved people as the consequence of sin, we often face pain. Specifically, there are times when we get so close to what we have been longing and waiting for--things may seem to line up and to appear to be a guarantee--only not to happen or not at the time or in the way we thought they would. We are often left distraught, frustrated, and confused. What do we do when things don't go as planned? How do we deal with the hurt that comes with it?
Let's start with a thought exercise. Take an aspect of your life you would like to remove or wish never happened. Now, think of an aspect of your life you currently love and are grateful for. Would that aspect of your life still occur without the other aspect that you removed? Likely not. You can’t remove one thing without changing everything else. Your line of thinking probably is along the lines of “well, if this didn’t happen, then this wouldn’t have happened, and then that wouldn’t have happened either.” I’ve heard this explained as the “butterfly effect,” the theory that changing one thing off sets everything else in the world. As Christians, we can better understand this concept as God’s sovereignty. God’s sovereignty means He is in control of everything, down to the smallest molecule. We are not left to chaos or chance. "We are not adrift in chaos. To me that is the most fortifying, the most stabilizing, the most peace-giving thing that I know about anything in the universe. Every time that things have seemingly fallen apart in my life, I have gone back to those things that do not change...He loves me. I am not at the mercy of chance" (Elisabeth Elliot).
God is in chage of both the big things and the little things. He is working all things for His glory, which includes even the smallest details of our lives. What a glorious God we serve that He is upholding the heavens and the earth, and yet He also cares for us on an individual basis. As Elisabeth Elliot once said: "The God who created, names and numbers the stars in the heavens also numbers the hairs of my head. He pays attention to very big things and to very small ones. What matters to me matters to Him, and that changes my life."
Hustle culture will tell you that if you work hard enough, you can make anything happen. On a similar but different note, new agers will convince you that you can manifest your dream life. We are simply not powerful to make things happen on our own. Both types of thinking either attempt to put man on God's level or God on man's level, both of which are wrong. It is God who paves our every step. Proverbs 16:9 (KJV) discusses how God's ways are supreme to that of man: "A man's heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps." Further, Psalm 37:23-24 (KJV) adds: "The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand." Dwelling upon the sovereignty of God should humble and lead us to an attitude of submission and surrender. Submitting to God’s will means letting go of our own expectations and accepting that the story may be written in a different way and/or timetable than the one you had planned.
Besides being a typology of Christ, the story of Joseph (Genesis 37-50) helps us to understand God’s sovereignty and intentionality. God ordered from start to finish how Joseph would go from “dreamer” to slave to the second-in-command in Egypt. Joseph acknowledges this in Genesis 50:20 (KJV): "But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive." Each facet of suffering Joseph went through was a piece in the puzzle that led him to being in charge of the famine in Egypt. I am sure that Joseph did not foresee himself being sold into slavery, especially by his own brothers, yet God did and personally ordained it. Joseph’s time overseeing Potiphar’s house prepared him to oversee all of Egypt. It was no surprise to God when Potiphar's wife falsely accused Joseph, leading him into prison. God used Joseph's time in prison to continue building his leadership skills and to put the butler and baker under his care to eventually have Joseph interpret their dreams. The Butler soon forgot Joseph, leaving Joseph in prison for two extra years, yet it was the correct timing for Joseph to interpret Pharaoh’s dream to prepare for the famine. We can see threaded through this story that the axiom "everything happens for a reason" is true and that there are no accidents or coincidences. Every person you meet and every circumstance sanctify you and/or act as a stepping stone on the path of the straight and narrow, both of which ultimately aim to help us to achieve our life's purpose of glorifying God and enjoying Him forever.
The question may arise of why things must occur a certain way. Is there no other way? Is this truly the best way? We may not understand why we’re facing certain situations because we can’t see the whole picture that God sees. We can only see a tiny speck of it all. Isaiah 55:8-9 (KJV) says "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts." Things may not always look good from our zoomed in perspective, but God is always working things for our good (Romans 8:28-29). At the core, we each must examine ourselves to see whether or not we find God trustworthy with our lives and whether or not we think we know better than he does.
Job must have faced these questions in the midst of his suffering. Job was considered to be a man who "was perfect and upright, and one that feared God, and eschewed evil" (Job 1:1, KJV). He was rich in children and possessions, and then, in an instance, he lost it all. Reading Job 1, the initial response may be to blame Satan for Job's suffering. However, if you look at verse 8, it is God who points out Job to Satan, and verses 11 and 12 suggest that Satan is limited in power and that God allows Satan to only do so much. This is supported in the New Testament in Luke 22:31-32 (KJV) when Jesus tells Peter: "Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren." Matthew Henry elaborated: "It is a limited power that the devil has; he has no power to debauch men but what they give him themselves, nor power to afflict men but what is given him from above." Why did God allow this? Matthew Henry reasons: "It is a matter of wonder that God should give Satan such a permission as this, should deliver the soul of his turtle-dove into the hand of the adversary, such a lamb to such a lion; but he did it for his own glory, the honour of Job, the explanation of Providence, and the encouragement of his afflicted people in all ages, to make a case which, being adjudged, might be a useful precedent." Let us find comfort that it is the God who love us who ordains all, both the good and the bad, and only allows so much.
What was Job's response to this all? Job 1:20-22 (KJV) tells us: "Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped, And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. In all this Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly." Job reasonably grieved for what he lost, for even Jesus grieved (John 11), but he did not turn against God. Nothing in this world is ours. When our lives don't go our way and we face disappointment, let us remember that our lives are not our own to begin with but have been paid for with the highest price (Romans 6:23, 1 Peter 1:18-19). Anything we are given is from the hand of the Lord, and He has the right to equally take it away. Even when we can't understand the "why" behind the circumstances, we still can worship because even if we are stripped of all the earthly possessions we have been given, we as Christians will still have our salvation. Our salvation is the "Pearl of Great Price" and the greatest treasure (Matthew 13:44-46).
Life itself is about Christ and glorifying Him. Whether you’re waiting for healing, a job, spouse, child, etc., our lives belong to God. We are subject to His purpose for our lives every single moment our heart is beating. When we don’t receive what we are waiting for or our lives are suddenly taken in a different direction, it’s because it just wasn’t part of His will. We may not understand in the moment, but when we’ve healed from the pain, maybe we will understand. Maybe we will never understand why. Often, we must triumph over our feelings with truth and faith that God is God and we are not.
I will leave you with this quote from Charles Spurgeon:
"In every case disappointments should be borne with the greatest possible patience and equanimity. I am sorry to say that we do not all bear them so, not even all of us who profess to be Christians. Remember that God has never promised that all our expectations shall be fulfilled--it would have been a doubtful blessing if such a thing had been guaranteed to us--and we might easily have expected ourselves into utter misery! Who are you that everything should happen just as you wish? Should the weather be fine simply because you want it to be so when a thousand fields are gasping for rain? Should you have the channels of trade turned in your direction when if that were the case, scores of others would be bankrupts? Is everything in this world to be so arranged that you shall be the darling and Pet of Providence? It cannot be right for such a state of things to prevail! Therefore, when we are disappointed, whether it is in little matters or great ones, let us bear the disappointment bravely and lay the whole case before the Lord in prayer. Let us ask Him why He contends with us. And if there is any reason for it which we can discover in ourselves, let us endeavor to remove it. Or if we can find no cause, let us believe that God acts in wisdom and in love--and let us cheerfully submit to whatever He appoints for us."
By: Bible and Hot Cocoa (IG: @bibleandhotcocoa)
Juliana is the founder of Bible and Hot Cocoa. She is a sinner redeemed by Christ seeking to share the Gospel, to stand up for biblical truth, and to encourage other women to embrace biblical womanhood and to grow in biblical literacy. In her free time, she loves to utilize her creativity, to read classics and reformed theology books, to exercise, to visit her local coffee shop, and to spend time with loved ones. Juliana's favorite book of the Bible would have to be a tie between Psalms and Proverbs (as of now), and her favorite biblical figure besides Jesus is Sarah (as of now).
Comments